Several of you have messaged, so I’m posting on this old blog b/c Patreon is locked to all when billing is paused-
I’m having a rare good day so I’m here to update.
I’ve already paused the March billing cycle, as well, but I will be mailing prints to you all when the ink has cured.
It’s still very smeary, so I’m guessing it might be a while. Sorry. :(
Gopher Tortoise in Longleaf Pine today
I don’t like to focus on all that’s gone wrong (K, you know what I mean) but I’ve been MIA and it needs a bit of explanation, but since this is intensely personal, it’s for patrons only and personal details will be deleted after the update serves its purpose.
~Some great news~
My very busy yet sweet sweet spouse got us a cabin at Amicalola Falls next month for a few days. On his spring break he’s taking some vacation days from work and we are heading to the foothills!
My bucket list AT solo hike/ Appalachian travel sketchis probably not going to happen before I kick the bucket b/c of my fun balance and other stroke deficits, but I’m REALLY hoping I can at least hike the approach trail.
Today I had a really good day physically. I went to a local but obscure Florida trail with my trusty trekking poles. Solo!
I made some observations on the overgrown trail as I thought about my amended bucket list.
There’s the hike you plan, and the one you walk. Rarely do they coincide. Enjoy your hike.
Less traveled paths are often overgrown and therefore filled with snakes. It’s still a nice walk.
With my particular body, flat land is not so easy in the midday sun. Neither is peeing. (So very thankful for my poles.)
Even in the "dry" season, there will be flooded portions.
Find a way to skirt the water.
When you can’t, it’s okay to turn around and find a different trail.
(If only I wasn't solo, and had a decently functioning cerebellum.)
Just a chonky 10 footer basking in the Florida sun.
Swampy paths aren’t ideal, but without the mud I couldn’t enjoy spotting the animal tracks.
It’s ok to slow down. You might miss incredible and strange beauty if you don’t.
Not only are Sundews gorgeous, these beauties are carnivorous.
Welp, I thoroughly enjoyed my hike today. I hope yours is going better than expected.
Thanks for sticking around through al the paused months.
*Update- we tried and did the beginning of the approach trail, but finishing to Springer was not a great option considering the length of the hike and my neurological fatigue issues, bbut it’s still on my bucket list.
I painted a watercolor of bridge over the stream near High Shoals Road on the Approach Trail. Our cabin at Amicalola was right down this little dirt road! I highly recommend a walk down High Shoals. It’s pure mountain holler magic.
Patrons will receive a notecard featuring the bridge in the rewards package.
Looong time no see. A lot has happened since I last posted here. A global pandemic threw me for a little loop, and then when I was just thinking about reinvigorating the blog, I had a life changing medical issue upend everything. I will post later about my cerebellar strokes, but for now I'll leave it at 2 quick things;
1. Too much reading, screen time, and especially scrolling, now makes me literally ill.
2. Always visit an ER if you have sudden onset loss of balance, dizziness, nausea, etc. and demand imaging with contrast. Don't let medical personnel dismiss you because of age. My strokes were caused by a congenital defect (PFO) in my heart. Misdiagnosis and inappropriate treatment likely caused a subsequent stroke.
Dealing with my new brain and limitations can be extremely difficult. Self acceptance and kind self talk is something which I am admittedly not great...
My therapist constantly suggests affirmations. 😏
Affirmations are, well, extremely corny.
While, yes, this could mean I need them even more, I still feel incredibly weird saying them.
But then I found Affirmators.
This deck has the absolute perfect balance of art- very cute illustrations
work- addressing often challenging and important aspects of mental health
and play - this deck does not take itself too seriously. Like, at all.
And some have been spot on for me, right down to the puking.
I'm 100% on board with this card, life is an incredible ride. I'm grateful to be in a body experiencing this world, even when the body is glitchy.
I've made a habit of pulling one card every day and trying to adhere to the advice on it.
I'm back here to share today's card because it seemed so appropriate and I hope it reaches the eyes that need it.
Connection
"I'm connected to the multitudes, and I can access their support at any time. Even a stranger offers a sense of comfort when they smile at me or make a dumb comment about the weather. Everyone is waiting to connect...
all I need to do is open myself up and pay attention.
(Note to self: work on witty banter about weather-related stuff.) "
This hits home more than before the strokes. You see, social media is something that now triggers nausea and headaches due to the scrolling and eye movement involved in scanning and reading.
I have removed all notifications and was really quite content, until I realized that I have very few real friends that communicate outside of social media. Sigh.
I'm also one of those people that abhors small talk.
I'm terrible at it, but I'd love to ramble on about the nature of Consciousness, the complexities of interconnection, or even religious origins and their influence on cultures for literal hours.
As you might imagine, this can leave me feeling extra isolated during times I'm facing some of the more challenging aspects of life after the strokes.
This card isn't one of the funnier cards in the deck, but it was what I needed.
You see, penguins move together in a seemingly choreographed pattern to create and retain heat.
(Look it up, super fascinating!)
I'm not the only one feeling isolated because of a shitty hand I was dealt.
Chances are, the guy at the grocery store that starts a conversation about the weather is feeling it, too.
And as much as I loathe surface convos about cold fronts, following cues and syncing up like the penguins do might help to shield from the proverbial frost of feeling alone.
(or at whatever local bookstore you wish to support)
Thanks for stopping by. I truly hope your day leaves you grateful for the short ride we are given. Even when it seems like a ride that's giving you whiplash.
I'll leave you with one more card if only b/c it's one that I've needed a bit more than before the strokes when dealing with callous, impatient, or discriminatory people. A-holes teach me more about myself every time, and why their assholery bothers me in the first place.
I hope everyone had a brilliant midsummer and you're staying as cool as possible or splendidly sweaty upon your preference and locale.
If you didn't have time to celebrate or it slipped your mind, remember that midsummer was celebrated around July 5 before the Gregorian calendar was adopted. ;) Another reminder that cultures have tried to track time for millennia, and it's all a human construct anyway, btw making numerology a largely culturally subjective and egoic practice. You can visit this site to see a list of some in descending accuracies, with the Persian calendar introduced in the 2 C. BCE being the most accurate.
Sooooo, back to the star of the show; the Sun. Funny enough, the center of our solar system doesn't have an official name, according to the IAU. Solis is obviously the Latin for sun, from Sol, the Roman equivalent to Helios, Greek god of the Sun. For that matter, neither do any of the inner planets nor our moon. This is where culture and human anthropomorphizations get involved.
One of my very first memories is of having one hand on a sturdy sapling, swinging my body weight around and around it as my hand slid over the smooth bark. I pivoted on one foot, looked up and swung. I let the brilliantly blinding gold light enter my eyes and what felt like my entire being, again and again. And I sang. I sang songs to the sun. I was barely three. Most of my early vivid memories are just this. The sun and me gazing on it. I didn't have a name for it, That feeling. Jubilation? Bliss? I guess I didn't need one. I think that feeling is what humanity chases and gives a personhood in a god. A warm stillness. On the solstice it is with us the longest.
We love to name things. Our meat computers have adapted perfectly for this. The dance of visual cortex and frontal lobe to Broca's area is something we can't get enough of- if you're at all interested in the psych & neuroscience and want to dip your foot in this, read this article and then hit me up for more- as a RH artist with crossed aphasia during migraines, I love this topic! Not being able to communicate or place words during auras was a scary and frustrating thing for decades. Once I studied it more and began to release the need to label, riding out the waves of non-verbal time has been fairly enlightening.
(Amaterasu of Japan)
The Sun, whatever you want to call it, him, or even her. Yes, her. In Japan, the sun goddess, Amaterasu Omikame was the queen of heaven and earth. In ancient Mesopotamia she was Arinna. This theme crosses into Anatolia, where Hecate has her origins as a sun goddess that mediates between the upper and underworlds. (With no mention by Hesiod in Theogony of all the witchy traits later attributed to her.) It can be Ra or Helios, who eventually gives way to Apollo, then Sol, and today we come back to another son that has a birthday celebrated in December and I think you get the point. My point? Every. Culture. Is. Different. And. Evolves. (Buuuut really doesn't if it thinks it's the "correct" culture and there's nothing new under the ...)
Our constant across the globe? The sun! Need warmth? Need food? Need light? Vitamin D? Serotonin? Awesome, me too. There's a star for that!
According to each group of people and their location, climate, etc., the folklore and resulting pantheon therefore religious ritual is going to vary, but without it there will be no life. Period.
That's why I chose to honor the solstice by visiting the ring tailed lemurs on Friday. I had the opportunity to see them in the Safari Park lemur encounter a couple of years ago during their sun-worship and it was a very cool experience. So against my better judgement, I brought one bottle of ice water & my sketchbook out into the 100+ heat index of the Central Florida Zoo. What followed was sweaty, sad, highly entertaining, but worth it.
-I have an unpopular stance with some fellow animal lovers-
One- Zoos can make me sad. Like really sad. Two- I still support zoos by being a member. Conservation, endangered species breeding programs, and education can make all the difference for a young person. Environmental protections aren't in place to save our animal brothers and sisters, so someone has to be the "bad" guy. Deal with it and or get to fixin' their habitat, my friend.
Next to the spider monkeys (omg, you guys, we saw an actual monkey in the wild this weekend by our house but that's a whole other story) the ring tailed lemurs exhibit was obviously the biggest in the primate section. I'm betting this is because they are "famous" due to the movie Madagascar. That's where they are from, the southern end of Madagascar, along with 60 other species of lemurs throughout the rest of the country. I haven't seen the movie, but I've seen clips. Idk. I have thoughts that I'll get to at the end. anyhow- All lemurs are endangered due to habitat destruction.
Back to the ring tailed lemurs- I was hot and dragging by the time I got back to their area, but they were fairly active. Active to the point it was a little difficult to sketch them. They were jumping about and eating leaves, then trying to find a comfortable position to sit, squat, nap, nope, climb, sit, squat, nap, nope, jump, hop, sit, etc. I was enjoying observing them and sketching croquis when a couple walked up (and after peering over my shoulder to see what I was doing) began watching them with me.
The two lemurs had been engaged in a mutual grooming session, and one was now trying to move to the seat the other had held. A bit of roughhousing ensued which very quickly broke off with the two running to separate areas of the enclosure. One of the lemurs began stroking his very long striped tail between his hands repeatedly. The woman beside me began to comment how much, "He just loves that pretty tail of his! Show it off!" Then she laughed, walked off, and it got me thinking about one of my favorite (here read triggering) topics anthropomorphization in animal symbology.
What this lemur was actually doing by caressing his luxurious, long, striped tail was prepping for a "stink fight". The scent glands located on his upper wrists (and chest) secrete a strong pheromone that is unique to him.
Instead of engaging in violent spats, ring tailed lemurs waft their tails toward opponents and mark areas they want to stake as their own claim. What we were witnessing wasn't just grooming, and certainly not vanity- a uniquely human trait. It was a behavior that helps enforce boundaries and keeps confrontation from escalating to dangerous levels by using your very unique essence, so to speak. More sciencey details on stink fighting here. I think that's a behavior to meditate on, don't you?
The woman's comments, along with the lemur's unique homeland made me wonder what would happen if I looked up "lemur spirit animal" just for kicks. I personally don't believe in catchall copy paste guidelines from self proclaimed spiritual gurus, because honestly most of them are full of more bullshit than the rhino exhibit and don't know much about the animals they are talking about. Go figure. When I did, I unfortunately wasn't surprised. Most sites seem to copy and paste from each other and were a hodge podge of wishful thinking that works well with the Barnum effect and other cognitive biases.
These two were oft repeated to people searching for meaning of their "totem" & got me the most-
"Spirits (sometimes creature) of the night" - Yeah. Lemur species are varied and most are actually diurnal, like the sun-basking ring tail. :)
Again, these are human traits projected onto a prosimian primate. I'm wagering the tail stroking and grooming behavior along with characterizations from a certain animated movie sparked this judgement. Let's maybe not put human traits on animals. Learn the animals, then glean what you can from how they behave on a personal and introspective level. If we're going to mash meaning into everything (and we are, it's how we roll) just be informed. I doubt the Malagasy people of Madagascar who thought the lemur was their sacred ancestor and had a soul would think they were superficial manipulative creatures. Oh, unless it's the Aye-Aye , a tiny species of lemur that they thought cursed them with death if it pointed its weird elongated middle finger at them so they hunted it almost to extinction. Just an observation. (Daaaaaamn, humans. Stop that already.)
You know about stink fighting. Here are some other basic facts.
They greet the sun every day in lotus like position, exposing their bellies. This warms them from the chilly night, prepping them for a day of foraging leaves, small insects, socializing, hopping about, etc.
They can learn patterns, be taught tool use, and simple arithmetic.
They are good swimmers and can travel by raft, i.e. floating debris & vegetation. This is probably how most lemurs got to Madagascar from Africa and proliferated so successfully due to the lack of other primates.
Their name is from a Latin word for a type of specter, or scary restless ghosts, lemures.
"I call [the creatures in this genus] lemurs, because they go around mainly by night, in a certain way similar to humans, and roam with a slow pace." -Taxonomist Carl Linnaeus- When he had discovered small lemurs and also classified the loris as a lemur.
Ring tailed, Brown, Indris, etc. lemurs are diurnal, it is mostly the smaller lemurs that are nocturnal.
Ok? Basics down? I recommend going to observe them if you can. Then you can decide what the lemur is to you. As humans, we will absolutely find meaning in any and everything. Life has the meaning you give it. Cookie cutter meanings make cookie cutter lives. Just like all animal guide meditation/intentions, the focus should be personal.
I sketched a few poses. I had a nice time observing them and thinking about how we think about them. By the way, the lemur didn't get his spot. He found a new one. I sketched him trying to nap on it before he moved.
The watercolor artwork featured on this post is a ring tail in his sun worship pose, with a circumpunt for the sun, upward equilateral for fire, and various intersecting lines at points for my own as a reminder of balance, harmony, and flow.
It is a reward for tier 3+ patrons. If you're not a patron but dig it, you can purchase a print here.
You'll see in the other reward downloads based on the lemur that my idea of sun worship and recharging isn't as fire as everyone goes on and on about. What I got from my meditative time after the lemur solstice;
There are no formulas for something that hasn't been yet. No wrote ritual or pose. No expectations from others of what it should be. Breaks are goods, naps are even better. No need to oust another or compete. You don't ever need another to give you permission or direction.
That perfect spot, your place in the sun, it will be yours and yours alone.
That said- excuse any typos, s'il vous plait. It's hot af and I need a swim break. It's pretty hot.
All tiers of Lemur solstice rewards are up for supporters on Patreon, and the July moon phase calendar for Tier1 +will be up Sunday.
The bright red flower (and the white) has symbolized death, dreams, and oblivion for many thousands of years before Flanders Fields made it ubiquitous in modern culture.
A field of poppies was said to stand before the entrance to the gates of the underworld realm of Morpheus, the Greek god of dreams and son of Hypnos. The poppy origin in Greek mythology is said to have come from Demeter/Ceres. Hypnos/Somnus, god of sleep, created it for her when she needed rest while searching for Persephone. The name corn poppy comes from this, as she was the goddess of grain. They have compounds that ancients used for a sleep and grief tonic and are still used in modern medicine.
Minoan "Poppy Goddess" c. 1300-1250 B.C.E.
The poppy has also been associated with several other goddesses, among them Nyx, Aphorodite, and the Minoan poppy goddess.
In Asian legend, (white) poppies sprang from the battle fields. This is noted in historical writings on the battle fields of Ghengis Khan, and also on fields after the Napoleonic wars. The fields John McCrae wrote of after WWI were covered in the red blooms. Was it a sign from Morpheus of the journey they were taking? A gift from Hypnos?
Chances are, there wasn't a magical or divine presence making poppies grow after the war. The activity of battle likely churned up soil, stirring already deposited seeds and even adding nutrients like iron and sulfur that poppies require for germination and blooming. Imagine looking across a bleak battle field littered with casualties. The uniforms and equipment are almost always a neutral color, blending into surroundings by design. Now, take into account that solid, bright colors are easiest for human cones to detect, with red being the color most strongly detected. It is also the color humans will notice psychologically before any other, as it is the color of blood. It warns us of danger, and contrasts with most of its natural surroundings.
It was a beautiful poem that gave solace to those in deep grief and to honor many taken by war.
As you see, poppies have a very long history of solace.
Today the red poppy is almost universally known as the symbol for honoring fallen soldiers.
There are other colors you can use to recognize groups in memoriam.
Black- African and Caribbean descent soldiers
Purple- War Animals (often overlooked!)
White- honoring those fallen and a commitment to peace.
The language of flowers varies throughout cultures, but the poppy has a fairly strong theme. Comfort, sleep, imagination, dreams, death, and lovers. Humans are pretty great at figuring out handy correlations, especially when it comes to our opiate receptors.
I'm sure at least some of you say this on the first (we will save the history for next month's Flower moon on Patreon- and in some traditions the Hare Moon)
This month I'm working in the Hare early because of his ties with the Pink Moon and Easter's date, as well as the Trickster energy kicks off the entire month. (I hope you weren't fooled badly by anyone today, but if you were, Jistu was probably happy.)
If you can, listen to
*this recording of award-winning Cherokee storyteller Robert Lewis telling a traditional Cherokee Jistu story. Trust me, his voice and delivery is beyond compare, and he has quick a bit of trickster energy himself. Me writing about it would not do the rich oral tradition a lick of justice.
( *Start at 8:00-13:45 for the first story about how Creator challenged rabbit & he got his long ears, and 17:48 to hear about rabbit's trouble outside the council meeting and what his true talent is if you don't have 20 minutes to hear the entire Lewis segment.)
Jistu is rabbit/hare in Cherokee, and he is the traditional trickster in most Eastern tribe mythologies. Coyote is the trickster for Western tribes, like Navaho and Apache.
April Moon / Pink Moon : This month's moon is called so because moss phlox is one of the first flowers to bloom and spread color in the spring. Another name is the Sprouting Grass Moon, and the Cherokee called it the Kawoni or Flower Moon although many others use that name for May's moon. There are a multitude of names for every moon within various cultures. Pink is fairly widespread, and I'm guessing it's because phlox is native to most of the Americas.
Phlox is in the Polemoniaceae family and there are 60 odd varieties of phlox. Phlox coming from the Greek for flame, its color is bright and vibrant against the new spring grasses.
Traditional medicinal uses for phlox included steeping the whole plant in a tonic for indigestion and using dried leaves as a detox tea, as well as topical application of a root tea for skin ailments, eye washes, and even venereal diseases. (Again- I am not recommending these applications, especially for the STIs. See a health care professional.)
In the language of flowers, phlox means; Our souls are united. or We think alike.
Using phlox in your garden to foster those harmonious warm and fuzzies seems a no-brainer, pink is always good for that 4th chakra whirl. The phlox flowers are susceptible to spider mites, eelworms, phlox bug, and powdery mildew (so probably whiteflies, too- bane of my existence) but so goes it with growing. Circle of life, get some green lacewings or ladybugs and watch them feast.
More things to come soon- just wanted to get the calendar link up for you to mark your moons if you wanted it. A full size downloadable print & PNG of the Pink Moon artwork will be coming to Tier 4+ soon, and a downloadable print of Hey, Jupiter is coming to Tier 3+ with the next line art upload when it's ready to scan.
Thanks for swinging by,
May the Pink Moon shine on new growth for you and yours,
May your heart sing like Jitsu's, even in the face of the Eagle,
May you teach others to dance to their heart's song.
~D. Renée
I'm back with the next Deciphering the Cauldron post and potion bottle project!
I'm going to post more about the ingredients after my upcoming festival show, ArtoberFest/ Winter Springs Festival of the Arts, this weekend. So look for more of those posts over on Patreon after I've hauled everything back home and had a chance to get a few winks.
If you're a Patron, you know what the "eye" of a plant is from our last post.
And you also know there are several plants that have their own folk names that refer to their looks.
I've drawn the blossom that the plant is from, and it's one that humans have used for millennia.
~Brassica nigra~
black mustard
Nope, not a real newt, but the eye of the plant does resemble a newt's eye. Teensy tiny and black when dried. Black mustard has varied use in folk medicine from colds to inflammation. It can relieve edema by stimulating the kidneys but it can also induce vomiting, so don't try it without an herbalist.
But the question I come to with each ingredient;
Why "eye of newt"?
There are a few ways to go with this, and I think they are all correct.
It has to do with which side you're on concerning the role of the sisters, and the perspectives the author was simultaneously coddling and leaving open.Are they meddling hags, truly supernatural beings like the Fates, or are they a manifestation of Macbeth's inner demons?
Black mustard seed is widely believed to be the seed Christ spoke of in His parable, and even that parable's meaning is debated within religious circles.
Black mustard seed holds a great deal of potential, energetically speaking, and its seeds germinate incredibly quickly. Once they drop, you'll almost certainly have a plant.
Black mustard seed is used in conjure work to confuse one's rivals.
This latter fact is the one I'm leaning toward, and also why I was early convinced that the author was not merely using gross sounding rhymes. This herb/spice is straight up used to sew confusion in enemies in witchy work, and the visions in Act IV are right in line. Whatever option you choose, it's an ingredient that is meant to crank the faith and potential of whatever you throw in after it. Up next-Toe of frog.Any guesses? Now, on to some light fun.
Snape approved Potion bottles for easy Halloweeny decor
Start collecting bottles~
I gathered a box and instead of throwing them into recycling, I stashed them in there for a while. Another inexpensive option is the Dollar Tree or the dollar bin section of Michaels. I already had a few of these little containers, like the green bottle to the left, that I got for buck or two.
It has a seal and everything, so storing actual herbs/flowers/seeds is an option, or even your loose crystals and beads. I lose the hell out of those, so cute containers are fantastic. But tbh, the seal makes it perfect for making large watercolor washes and not needing to worry about them drying out. If you paint in washes, pick one up for that alone.
Sand paper will rough up the surface so that paint can stick to the plastic. With some plastic bottles, like this orange rx bottle, it looks kind of cool with just the sanded surface.
Craft paints are fine for this project. I made some washes to create a dirty, drippy effect.
If you have sticky labels that won't come off- leave them! IMO, the more texture, the better.
A couple layers of craft paint...
Glue for oozing drips and sticking on your cap adornments.
Things like rocks, twine, beads, etc. to make them look as bog witchy or sophisticated as you please.
After you print out your labels, cut them and either use scrapbooking tape (great option if you don't want to leave the labels on year-round) or an all purpose glue and apply with a brush on the back and edges. If your glue was too watery and the ink smears a bit, lightly brush it around for an aged look. OR you could print it out and start again. Patrons can print their downloads at home as often as they like.
Allow the labels to dry, add any extra decoration you think it needs, and you should be good to go.
My artemisia seeds are going in my Blind Worm's Sting jar, which is good, b/c those things are tiny and were going to get lost in my seed drawer.
Put things inside;
herbs,
the office kitty, secrets you'll take to the grave, etc.
I gathered a box and instead of throwing them into recycling, I stashed them in there for a while. Another inexpensive option is the Dollar Tree or the dollar bin section of Michaels. I already had a few of these little containers, like the green bottle to the left, that I got for buck or two.
